I played that record all night.

One year ago, I could still wake up at 10am without worrying about being late for anything else other than classes and assignments. Those were the most beautiful days of mine during my late teenage years. Endless time spent with friends and mates, being fearlessly towards uncertainties and never lost faith in myself.

Before you even notice how fast the time has passed, the ambiguity behinds everything tore down the wall of confidence and hope. That was the time when I woke up wearing that big black robe, realizing that I’ll be stepping into the one and only existing world – Reality. No one can never run from it, no matter how much fear everyone has in their heart, the Reality will still be waiting you after every getaway. The Reality, the Working world which teaches you about true responsibilities, interpersonal relationships and others important aspects in life.

But I know I have something in me, that’ll I’ve learned to treasure and embrace – my childishness. I’m playful and I know I’ll always want to explore more and more in everything. And I’ll admit that I’m blur under certain circumstances. I used to tell myself to be mature all the time and childishness is unacceptable. But then I realized that it’s not possible for me to deny and hide my naughty yet very-me side all time. So I chose to only show it in front of my love ones.

It’s almost the end of 2011. Maybe, you’ll wait for my review post of the year? =]

I’m bound in chains, I am bound to you.

‘Love’ does not own my trust all the way, in my life, till now.

Yes. I’d opened up to those who once I thought was the right person. I’ve allowed myself to be vulnerable and have it taken away when the relationship didn’t work out. And then, my dear I’ve always blame myself for giving out that much and warned myself to not be like that the next time. But, I always make the same mistakes again – knowing something wasn’t right, knowing that person is not the one, but continue letting feelings take control over the rational me.

I am a pessimist, every time I end a relationship when I was the one who gave in so much for it to work out. I’ve learned so many times that do not let feelings take control of me. I’ve been through so many heartaches that I can actually sense and know when something is not right. I warned myself so many times that do not ever fall before I unsure about the relationship and that boy.

And I’m starting to regret not spending all of here with you.

I’m done with my finals, and I know how much I’ve been slacking in blogging.

So here am I, trying to update every single things that I’ve missed to post it up here.

Maafkanlah ku tak bisa hidup tanpa kamu

There goes my 4 years of university life.
How I wish, that time will stop at this point,
and all of us won’t need to say,
the saddest…
“Goodbye”.

To take you mine, stay with me tonight.

i’ve just finished my cherry tomatoes, which i bought back from Cameron.

and yes, Cameron trip was fun, very enjoyable indeed. i’ve got to spend times with my course mates and we all got to hang out together at a cooling place, where none of us thought of assignments or final year project.

we were suppose to take a lot of pictures there, but yet i think we did more shopping than photo-taking session, and i don’t even know why too. but well, all of us had fun, and that the most important thing isn’t it? and i know, there’ll be more outing coming up ’cause we realized that we had such little time to spend with each other already! yea, i’m graduating soon, as in i’ll be out of university in 2 months time. sighs. i’m so gonna miss everyone in my class and my girlfriends!

oh yea, did i ever mention about my women?

these are the women i’ve owned from my class, LOL!

basically i’ll call them woman or i’ll just call their full name, it’s just our thing, lol. it hurts to think that we’re going our separate ways in such a short time, ’cause 4 of us came from different places and we can be crazy whenever we’re around each other.

i’d lost my best friend last year, and i never thought that one day i’ll find someone who can be such close to me in class again. but thank you god, for letting me know these girls better in my final year, and for letting me to get close to them and get to know how wonderful these girls are. i’m glad, to have them in my final year, to go crazy with them in our own ways, to share secrets with them, to get to gossip with them.

I <3 you gurls!

and boyfriend, I heart you. =]

i can’t get out of my bed today!

it’s only the starts of new semester.

but i’m so lazy to go to classes and i’m having much stress now. ah damn!

but still, i’m wasting my time here and there. lazying around with nothing. i just can’t get my mind or hands or legs into doing works, now. =[

it’s just the starting of the new semester. so screw it, who cares. XD

and yea, i know this is just so pointless.

but THIS…!

if only you know what THIS means.

cheers.